Ghosts in Thailand are two a penny, or nowadays better described with the Thai baht currently showing great strength on the worlds currency exchange as one a baht. If you’ve been to Thailand and haven’t heard a ghost story then have you really been at all.

This week I picked up on a ghost story which I think should be shared with my readers. The ghost killing-gizmo that could change the world tells the tale of the Trisaksri Ghost Repellent (pictured right), a simple plug in device which the developers claim will rid your home of all ghosts. They even give a 100% guarantee.

The machine was developed in a ghost free laboratory in Bangkok on March 5th 2009 but since then has been withdrawn from the company’s range of products. Dan Aykroyd and Harold Ramis may have had their own sophisticated weapons to capture ghouls in the hit 1984 American science fiction comedy film Ghost Busters, but I set out with my bare hands and numpty type brain to try and track down the truth behind the all amazing Ghost Repellent machine.

In respect for the company’s privacy in this matter I have decided to omit their name from my report. If you do wish to know the developer’s name then follow the link above.

The explanation of the machine’s method of disposing of the ghastly ghouls is best described by the company themselves. In their very own brand of laboratory English, prototype grammar and a grade of spelling which was born from Scrabble games played in big city ghettos, here are the company’s own words with an introduction and summary of the Ghost Repellent.

You or someone may have experience with ghost or devil after bought new second hand house from the former owner. Some houses may have bad spirit inside which will interfere your daily life unhappy and frighten your children. Finally many of you leave away the house and find a new home. We have a solution for you, “Trisaksri Ghost Repeller”. Just place this device in side your house and switch ON. All ghost and devil will leave away your home and won’t come back again. Now who run away, You or ghost ? Save money in finding a new home.

How it works ?

Trisaksri Ghost Repeller © composed of complex electronic circuit. The video camera was special designed to capture the invisible and inaudible signal generates from natural phenomenon such as ghost or spirit. The signal was then converted to radio signal and transmit to KILLER WAVE. The ghost spirit will be destroyed at this process. The device output is extreamly sensitive to changes of as little as 0.5% of the strength of the Earth’s magnetic field. Generally Ghost spirit usually emit weak natural electric field which can not be measured by normal meter or can not be responded by humen senses. The device has been designed to ignore the AC fields of power lines, appliances, etc. It only interact with ghost’s and animal spirit and no harm to humen health.

Before you grab your credit card and mobile, I best explain once more the $259 contraption is no longer on sale although I was offered the original prototype myself.

I sent out an email to the design team never expecting to receive anything back in a month of Sundays. The very next day (yesterday) I received an answer. My email asked how many Ghost Repellents they had sold. Here’s their reply. ( click to enlarge ).

Having never been woken from my nights sleep by the sound of a headless drummer boy standing at the end of my bed beating on a military drum, my reaction to their kind offer was a resounding no. On closer reading of the email I concluded the company had now expanded and were employing the use of a young uneducated secretary with hands the size of an Irish navvy and detached retinas.

Beyond The Mango Juice apologises for reporting this great invention after its withdrawal from public sale but don’t despair. The prototype team are currently working on a mosquito repellent.

My guess is it’s a CD with a sound loop and a 100% guarantee.

” Exterminate, exterminate, exterminate….”

If the Ghost Repellent company does read this report then I hope they view it in the spirit it’s meant.

Image by tripadvisor

…

The above image is from TripAdvisor’s Airplane Seat-Mate From Hell survey and whilst I am unaware of the ongoing status of the survey, looking at the photographs I have sat next to a few of them myself. I think I can confidently say I personally don’t fit into any of the categories.

Being on a long flight isn’t much fun from take off to landing and the person(s) occupying the seat next or either side of you can make your flight for the better or worse. Aside from shortly before take off hearing a Steve Martin-esque voice announce ” this is your Captain speaking, ” sitting next to someone with a running nose or a wagging tongue can make your flight a torturous ordeal.

I’ve been lucky on my numerous flights to have never been seated next to the Oblivious Parent, probably my own personal choice of seat-mate from hell. I always try to get positioned right at the back of the plane, it’s easy for toilet access and the drinks and food galley is a few steps away. It is on a very rare occasion I’ve seen children sat at the rear, although I have heard their screams many a time.

I’m the type of person who can easily develop an in-flight dry throat and cough (air condition has this affect on me). I get quite uncomfortable about the probable disruption I’m causing to other passengers and remedy the problem by getting a drink of water from the air stewardess. The oblivious parent seems to ignore all cure or solution to their fellow passengers agitation caused by their noisy child. This one would get my vote…..then again.

The Bio-Hazard…sniff, sniff, sniff. It’s one of those noises that really irritates me. If you’re due to board a flight and the days leading up to it see you come down with a cold or possible influenza, you take medication to relieve the symptoms. Not the bio-hazard passenger. Sat next to the bio-hazard traveler and Elton John or whoever just doesn’t sound quite so good over your headphones.

And it seems to me you lived your life

Like a candle in the wind

Never knowing who to cling to

When the rain set in, sniff sniff sniff.

The Chatter-Box is another who really gets my goat. I honestly don’t want to know about their messy divorce and how they have now found love in Thailand with a ladyboy half their age. The ins and outs of getting caught in your next door neighbours greenhouse late at night with their teenage boy and a greased cucumber is no concern of mine but…

” Yes I can obviously understand my wife being a little annoyed, but divorce was a little harsh.” he drones.

You’ve just got to hope when the food comes round he hasn’t ordered a special salad.

Your best bet with the chatter-box is to put on the headphones and feign sleep. If that fails then get blind drunk and blatantly ignore him.

The Nervous Wreck is in all of us but it depends to what degree. Air turbulence does scare me a bit, mainly because I might spill my Jack Daniels and Coke and the wait for another one depends on the pilot’s prowess in gaining safer altitude. They say some people can hear a pin drop, the nervous wreck can hear a pin drop and roll to a stop…..Plop.

” Jesus shit man, one of the engines has just blown.” he screams and grabs your hand, somehow drawing blood with his chewed nails.

” Calm down sir, the gentleman in front has just popped open a tube of Pringles.”

In truth you’re thinking.

” You bastard, piss off and annoy someone else.”

The problem with the nervous wreck is your suggestion of an alcoholic drink to qualm their fears is met with the resounding answer that it would only make them sick.

I’ve touched on just four of the ten choices in Trip Advisor’s poll, the other six being Seat Swapper, Entertainment Director, Carrie Carry-All, Space Intruder, Self Entitled and Smelly Snacker. Which of the ten would be your least favourite seat mate.

If any of you do have a minute to spare then please click on the link at the top of the post and register your vote in Trip Advisor’s survey. If enough of you vote then Trip Advisor might forgive me for borrowing their survey image. Thanks.

Credits

Photograph Medicine   by  Dolnikow  / Dreamstime

Song Lyrics by Bernie Taupin

Photograph Cucumber by © Lukajani | Dreamstime.com

Beyond The Mango Juice kicks off the year with a slimmed down monthly blog review format. Due to the increased content of my Thai blogroll I have been forced to omit entries from my world blog links as the ever increasing length of the review has forced me to compress future posts.

I have recently added some floating icons to my blog which you can see in the top right hand corner of the screen. I would like readers opinions as to whether they are tacky, wacky or plain cool. The icons have been placed in an effort to increase site hits and also improve my Feedburner readers membership (top orange icon). Your comments are most welcome. The photographs supplementing this month’s review were all taken in the garden of our village home.

Thailand, Land of Smiles kicks off the new year review with a tale of Japanese horror movies and superstitious Thai beliefs. Why aren’t people answering their phones in Thailand, A Thai Superstition is Born…Again is a very funny post with connections to Japan’s horror movie scene and the Thai’s obsession with the spiritual world.

Ayutthaya is the old Siamese kingdom which existed for over 400 years until it fell to the Burmese army in 1767. Nowadays Ayutthaya is a popular tourist destination and whilst there My Thai Friend visited a floating market with a difference. Ayutthaya Floating Market is a water borne show featuring artists from Chiang Mai University performing traditional Thai folklore. Hollywood’s biggest stars may think they can walk on water but in Ayutthaya they really do.

Women Learning Thai is first and foremost a language learning resource for those of us trying to master the Thai language.  Blog author Catherine does however mix her posts with reflections of her forays inside and outside of Bangkok. Zebras, Questions and the Chao Mae Tiger Shrine sees Catherine and her Thai language teacher head off in search of zebras with the help of her regular taxi driver Khun Pisout.

With the Thai baht still running strong against the world’s major currencies now is probably not the best time to house hunt in Thailand and expat Udon Thani takes a look at the Issan housing scene. John’s post issan house hunting in udon thani gives advice towards the best time to view and the hidden pitfalls quite often unbeknown to buyers of houses on new estates in and around Udon Thani.

Behind the Noodle Curtain puts forward the argument that when it comes to beauty Nakhon Phanom is a clear winner in the Isaan region. The town is set on the banks of the Mekong River with the jungle hills of Lao a picturesque view on the other side of the water. Beauty comes in many forms in Nakhon Phanom sees Rick leaving town with a promise to return and once again explore the riverside streets and to admire the beautiful ladies of Nakhon Phanom.

A Kiwi, monkeys and a monk with some magic seeds all added up to make it a busy week for Lawrence and Thai Life in Phana. The quiet life in Ubon Ratchatani is put to one side as guests and unexpected visitors bring a little youth and eccentricity into Lawrence and Pensri’s days. Visitor Week in Phana keeps track on the comings and goings with the help of some smashing photographs.

If you enjoy reading blog posts which are accompanied by fine photographs then Retired in Thailand and Loving It is a bookmark for you. Malcolm takes to his hammock and revisits a post from the past in Revisiting the Bridge on the River Kwai and the Death Railroad. If you love WWII history then you’ll enjoy this one for sure.

It was National Children’s Day (วันเด็กแห่งชาติ) in Thailand last month and for Jungle Girl and my jungle life it was open house time. Mail, Pha Ngan and Mai are three young kids who are the focus of Kid’s Day and the celebrations involved. The post lays down the background behind these three young children from poor families who each have their own special qualities. Definitely a good read for those of you with young children.

Jon from Jonny Foreigner got married in December and by late January there was A new arrival in the family but not the sort you would find clothed in pink or blue. Jon’s new baby is his social media blogging site Jon Russell : Social Media in Thailand which as Jon explains is about ‘ web, technology and how convergence of the two is shaping everyday life and communication.’ If you’re into social media and Thailand then check out Jon’s new bouncing baby full of bytes.

Being the innocent party involved in a road accident in Thailand doesn’t mean you won’t end up footing the bill. The Thai Pirate’s post Crash in Thailand – update recounts how despite being cleared of all blame by the police, Ben Shillington faces a possible court appearance unless he reaches a settlement with the injured party who was at fault in the incident. This one is a must read for any Thailand newbie who is considering renting a car or motorcycle and taking to Thailand’s dangerous roads.

Thailand Musings has started a round of Thai blog interviews and here’s blog author Steve’s introduction to his innovative idea… ‘The series will be in the form of interviews with other Thailand bloggers and are an attempt to introduce them to those who may not be aware of them, to share their contributions and ideas with others and hopefully to have a bit of fun getting to know these other Thailand bloggers.’……Vern from Thai Pulse gets the series off to a flyer.

Trip to Laos part three from Life in rural Thailand covers the journey back from Laos to Thailand and a three day stay at Don’s Place in Mukdahan overlooking the Mekong River. The journey hits a problem at the Thai border but ends with luxury accommodation in idyllic surroundings and proof to all of the quality lodgings available in the Land of Smiles. The food at Don’s Place looks absolutely heavenly too.

Camille’s Samui Info blog is a new addition to my Thai blogroll. Camille has been living on Koh Samui since the end of 1999 and started out working as a dive Instructor and in 2003 became a PADI Course Director. Dip your toes into Camille’s world and read Catcantoo Bar and Restaurant, Bang Rak which will give you a tasty insight into life on the island.

That’s all from Beyond The Mango Juice’s Thai blog review for this month. Enjoy.

On many occasions in the Land of Smiles I’ve booked into a hotel for an overnight stay. Wonderful Wi and I tend to do so when we fancy a night out in Udon Thani for whatever reason. The scenario as we approach the hotel entrance is nearly always the same.
We jump out the samlor with [...]

It was Boxing Day, the day after Christmas and I quite fancied taking a ride into Udon Thani. A couple of days later we were due to take our pre New Year pilgrimage to the mountains of Loei Province to spend a few days visiting the annual Phu Rua Flower Festival. In the 12 months [...]