About ten years ago I had a couple of mates who holidayed in Thailand and it got me thinking….sat in the pub with Tom it was all beer, beer, talk about women, football, women and beer. How it come between man’s two most important subjects I don’t know but Thailand entered the slurred debate.
I challenged Tom to “book a taxi and we’ll go to the airport now,” sure enough he did and twenty minutes later we were chucking passports and minimal clothing into cheap and tacky sports bags and we set off with an ear to ear grinning taxi driver.
Nearing Heathrow I slid the carrier bag full of empty beer cans, cigarette butts and a chicken carcass to Tom’s half of the back seat, it was returned with a large belch. After purchasing two, later to be discovered overpriced BA tickets we back slapped and high fived about how we’d got a great deal….and then headed to the nearest bar.
A few hours later and a hurried stagger we loudly approached the departure lounge to be met by the then customary “Single Mans Holiday Questionnaire.” Have you been drinking?….Are you sure you’re not drunk?….Can you walk in a straight line?….You will behave on the flight won’t you?. We were chuffed to bits when asked to personally meet the flight captain, thought it was the questionaire winners prize.
It became clear that this was not the case when he announced “let them board” and the stewardess announced with a slap on whiter than white false smile “But we cannot serve you any alcoholic drinks”…our world fell apart.
It may have been air turbelance possibly sheer dehydration but after about five hours of drunken sleep we simultaneously woke, looked at each other and with timing synchronized swimmers would have died for, mouthed to each other “what the hell are we doing on here we were only going to the pub”…THE BEGINNING …..TO BE CONTINUED
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